Mental illnesses, such as bipolar disorders, have a great impact not only on the lives of patients but also on their family and friends.
What family and friends go through during the depressive phase
During this phase, family and friends often feel destitute, sad, anxious, angry, and powerless. They may even feel guilty for not being able to help the person. The family circle often has to take on an increased workload with overwhelming responsibilities. It is important that the people surrounding the individual take care of themselves to avoid becoming ill. Consequently, do not hesitate to ask for help from other family members and friends in order to deal with this added workload. You must accept that, for a certain period of time, not everything will be exactly as it was. It is also important to obtain information regarding depression to gain a better understanding about what your friend or relative is going through.
Often, family members do not know how to speak to the depressed individual. They are afraid of asking too many questions or conversely appearing as though they are uninterested in the person’s condition. Try to provide support in your own way and according to your own means. Be patient. Simply acknowledging that depression is a disease will allow your loved one to feel less guilty about his or her behaviour.
What family and friends go through during the manic phase
During hypomania and mania phases, family and friends often have trouble following the person’s thoughts and understanding what he or she means. They may also find themselves having to rein the person in. Loved ones can become frustrated, angry, and annoyed, which can cause major conflict. Often during the hypomania phase, people around the individual do not recognize that the person is affected by the disorder. The actions of people with a bipolar disorder during a period of mania often leave a lasting effect on relationships, as these periods can lead the individual down high-risk avenues (financially, sexually or professionally).
As a family member or friend, you can encourage the individual to avoid overly stimulating situations during these phases. Avoid arguing with the person going through the mania phase because their judgment is often impaired. You can try to make them aware of the inherent dangers of the risky situation, but keep in mind that discussion will be difficult at this phase of the disorder. As a result, you should only talk when the individual is stable in order to establish a plan of action (for example, agree that the person will give you his or her credit card once hypomanic/manic symptoms appear).
The person affected with a bipolar disorder needs you. Your support will help this person objectively analyze the disease and establish useful and accessible goals.
Mini-Psych School videos
| Volatile Emotions - Bipolar and other mood disorders (2011) | The Ups And Downs of Bipolar Disorders (2009) |
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Watch other Mini-Psych School lectures.
How to communicate with someone who suffers from Bipolar Disorders
In the depressive phase
- Speak in a calm voice
- Concentrate on one topic at a time
- Be patient
- Speak about routine topics as a way to open doors to communication
- Do not blame the person
In the manic phase
- Decrease stimulation
- Keep conversations brief
- Resolve urgent problems immediately
- Do not try to reason or argue
- Do not be authoritative but remain firm, practical and realistic
- Concentrate on one topic at a time
- Be patient
What can family and friends do in the case of a crisis?
Check the individual's medication
Help the individual plan strategies to reduce symptoms
Encourage the patient to consult his or her treating team
Inform the treating team of the individual's state
In case of emergency, contact emergency services or the police if their intervention is deemed necessary
For more information, consult the ressources in family support and the brochure Tips to better deal with anger – Guide for the family.
[Bipolar Disorders: causes, symptoms and treatments] [Bipolar Disorders: advice for the family]
